Officials from area law enforcement and domestic violence agencies are reminding the public of available resources following three major incidents that occurred in Bucks and Montgomery counties over the weekend — two of which resulted in five deaths.
"Crimes involving domestic violence are horrific events. There is the immediate victim, and then there’s the next level of victims — family, friends and people at all levels of relationship with the involved parties,” said Hatfield Police Chief Bill Tierney. "The events of recent days in the area are a stark reminder that domestic violence is all around us, both near and far. It is everywhere.”
Just before 9 a.m. on Saturday morning, 26-year-old Andre Gordon Jr. allegedly shot and killed his stepmother, teen sister, and the mother of his two children in a pair of shootings in Falls Township. Later that afternoon, police in Montgomery County were dispatched to a home in the Huntingdon Valley section of Lower Moreland Township, where they discovered 44-year-old Al Allaberg had fatally shot his ex-wife, then killed himself in the walk-in closet of the home’s master bedroom.
The following morning, law enforcement in Newtown Township issued a shelter-in-place order after a man allegedly held a gun to his girlfriend’s head during an argument, leading to an hours-long standoff that resolved when police learned he had left the home prior to their arrival.
"Our thoughts and prayers go out to the families affected by these senseless and horrific acts,” said Montgomery Township Police Chief Scott Bendig. "It is heartbreaking that it takes incidents like these to shine a light on the ongoing societal problem of domestic violence.”
In the wake of the three incidents, Lansdale Borough Police Chief Mike Trail had his department issue a release on their Crimewatch platform to draw attention to the issue of domestic violence, while providing links and phone numbers to countywide services and assistance available to victims.
"Obviously the events over the weekend led me to reaffirm that victims of domestic violence should seek out opportunities to get help. It’s nothing to be embarrassed about, and there is no shame in seeking help,” Trail said. "The tragic events this weekend in Falls Township, Newtown, and Lower Moreland, exemplify that when these issues arise, they need to reach out and seek help. There are a lot of organizations willing to help.”
All three police chiefs said instances of domestic violence can carry a certain number of hurdles in relation to victims coming forward, be it personal embarrassment, a belief that domestic violence is a private family matter, or the hope that the abuse will cease and the relationship will improve.
But the latter is usually not the case, they said, and that is why they have trained officers to aid those victims who come forward seeking to end the cycle of abuse.
"It’s a vicious cycle where a lot of the victims feel trapped, so they don’t feel that they’re able to confront their abuser and instead they rationalize that it won’t happen again,” Trail said. "But we know that the cycle of violence progressively gets worse over time.”
"If your partner has hit you before, realize they will hit you again. It is never easy, but you have to get away from the situation,” Tierney added. "You are important — don’t let anyone tell you anything different.”
Beyond the initial response to the incident, police pointed to several available resources in Bucks and Montgomery counties created explicitly to aid victims of domestic violence via resources designed to help them identify and escape dangerous situations and relationships. Those resources include the Victim Services Center of Montgomery County, the Women’s Center of Montgomery County, A Woman’s Place in Bucks County, and Laurel Housein Montgomery County.
Domestic Violence Statistics Show Issue is Pervasive
According to data provided by Stacy Dougherty, Deputy Director of Laurel House, and Jennifer Locker, interim Executive Director of A Woman’s Place, one in four women and one in seven men ages 18 or older in the United States will be injured as a result of intimate partner violence, and nearly half of all LGBTQ+ individuals will experience domestic violence in their lifetime.
Additional statistics provided include:
"There are many barriers and obstacles that prevent victims of domestic violence from coming forward, and each are unique to their situation,” said Dougherty. "Not having access to financial support, being isolated from friends and family, having their immigration status tied to their abuser, and the fear of what will happen to themselves or their loved ones if they try to leave, are just a few of the examples as to why a victim may be unable to leave.”
Dougherty added that even in circumstances where a victim does decide to leave an abusive relationship, the danger posed will only increase over the months that follow.
"It’s important to know that the most dangerous time for a victim of domestic violence is up to a year after they’re left their abusive relationship” Dougherty said. "When the abuser loses that power and control over their victim, they will go to extreme measures to regain it.”
"It takes a lot of safety planning and thought for someone to [leave the relationship] safely, which is why it’s so important to connect them to a trained advocate,” Dougherty added. "Instead of asking ‘why do they stay,’ we should be asking ‘how can we make it easier for them to leave?’”
Locker echoed Dougherty’s sentiment, adding that additional issues can arise once a victim leaves an abusive relationship, including parenting, housing, and financial strains.
"Even after safety planning and exiting the relationship, survivors are faced with barriers like having to be a single parent, navigating childcare and employment maybe for the first time, and trying to find a safe and affordable place to live,” Locker said.
Due to the complexity of domestic abuse instances, organizations like Laurel House and A Woman’s Place provide a comprehensive list of services, beginning with immediate crisis intervention and including long-term services aimed at helping victims heal from the trauma and rebuild their lives. Other services include emergency safe housing, crisis counseling, support groups, children’s advocacy, accompaniment through the criminal and Protection from Abuse Order processes, rapid rehousing, and legal representation.
"We all deserve to feel safe in our families and relationships,” Locker said. "If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, please reach out to your local domestic violence agency. You are not alone.”
Where to Get Help
If you or someone you know is in an abusive relationship or is the victim of domestic violence, help is available.
"I’ve seen the cycle of domestic violence broken because these organizations come into the fray, and they are able to intervene and support the victims,” Trail said. "These organizations have done a great job of helping liberate men and women from being victims of domestic violence.”
Visit A Woman’s Place,Laurel House, and the Woman’s Center of Montgomery County by clicking their respective links, to gain access to additional resources and services.
See also:
Montgomery County Prothonotary’s Office Rolls Out Improvements for Domestic Violence Cases
Lease Exit Clause for Domestic Abuse Victims Debated in Pa. House Committee
Upper Dublin Lutheran Church to Hold Gun Violence Prevention Forum
Lansdale’s Mental Health Co-Responder Program Continuing to Draw Attention
Sen. Collett Announces $5.7 Million in Public Safety, Victims’ Services Grants for Montgomery County